When I was a mother’s helper, the mom of the family I worked for sat with her three oldest children and watched a PBS special showing the birth of a baby. The mom thought it would be a good starting point for answering questions about the facts of life. As her five-year-old studied the baby coming out of the birth canal, he asked, “Mom, does that hurt?” “Oh, yes, it does,” she said, remembering her difficult deliveries. “Wow,” he continued in awe, “does it hurt the mother too?”

Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son.

Mom: Wake up, son. It’s time to go to school.
Son: But why, Mom? I don’t want to go.

Mom: Give me two reasons why you don’t want to go.
Son: Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!

Mom: Oh, that’s no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready.
Son: Give me two reasons why I should go to school!

Mom: Well, for one, you’re 52 years old. And for another, you’re the Principal!

***

Teacher: Millie, give me a sentence starting with i.
Millie: I is …

Teacher: No, Millie. Always say, “I am.”
Millie: Okay. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

***

When I was 28, I was teaching English to high school freshmen in a school where occasionally the faculty and staff were allowed to dress casually. One of those days I wore a sweatshirt and khakis. A student came in and her eyes widened, “Wow!” she exclaimed. “You should totally wear clothes like that every day. You look twenty, maybe even thirty years younger!”

***

“Jill,” a teacher reprimanded the teenager in the hall, “do you mind telling me whose class you’re cutting this time?”

“Like,” the young teen replied, “uh, see, okay, like it’s like I really don’t like think like that’s really important, y’know, like because I’m y’know, like I don’t get anything out of it.”

“It’s English class, isn’t it?” replied the teacher.
 

“This should be taken care of right away.”
(I’d planned a trip to Hawaii next month, but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures itself.)

“We have some good news and some bad news.”
(The good news is, I’m going to buy that new Jaguar. The bad news is, you’re going to pay for it.)

“I’d like to prescribe a new drug.”
(I’m writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig.)

“If it doesn’t clear up in a week, give me a call.”
(I don’t know what it is. Maybe it will go away by itself.)

“This should fix you up.”
(The drug company slipped me some big bucks to prescribe this stuff.)

“I’d like to run some more tests.”
(I can’t figure out what’s wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one.)
 

Authorities say the Mafia has a big presence on the social networking site, Facebook. It’s easy to spot a mobster’s profile–all the personal items say “None of your friggin business. The less you know the better.” except for their hobbies, which are “Doing favors for people” and “Controlling all the trash hauling in Worlds of Warcraft.”

—

I love Facebook. it’s the only place where I can talk to a wall and not look like an idiot

—

Forbes billionaire list is out and CEO and co-founder of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg is the youngest billionaire on the list at age 25. Betcha his Mother doesn’t tell him he’s spending too much time on Facebook.

—

A North Carolina waitress was fired for complaining on Facebook about a small tip she received. A lesson to all servers who like to post online complaints: write them where they’ll never be seen — on MySpace.

—

British health experts are blaming rising cases of syphilis on social media sites like Facebook.
Clearly the Facebook apps are much more advanced in Britain.

—

Facebook users have been warned about a virus known as “Koobface,” which uses the network’s messaging system to infect computers. While the virus had little effect on most users, it did make friending people difficult for Skidmore freshman, Mike Koobface.

—

A hacker attack briefly shut down Twitter on Thursday. Millions of twitterers were forced to talk to each other the old fashioned way. Through Facebook.

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”
 

While on vacation with my son and his family, I shared a room with my 4 year old granddaughter.

One morning when she awoke, she told me she had some nice dreams and proceeded to tell me about them.

I told her I wished that I was able to dream like she does.

She said, “But you can’t, grandma, because you snore too much.”

—————-

Preparing for a family vacation, my sister-in-law and her husband explained to their young children that they would be sitting in the car for a very long time. The kids were told they would not be arriving at their destination until after dark, and were warned not to keep saying, “Are we there yet?”

After a few minutes of peaceful driving, their five-year-old daughter perked up. “Is it dark yet?”

—————-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab to begin a vacation in Paris. Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked, “Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?”

Doyle was flabbergasted. He asked the driver if he had ever seen him before.

“No, sir,” the driver responded, “I have never seen you before.” Then he explained, “This morning’s paper had a story about you being on vacation in Marseilles. This is the taxi stand where people who return from Marseilles always come to. Your skin color tells me you have been on vacation. The ink-spot on your right index finger suggests to me that you are a writer. Your clothing is very English, and not French. Adding up all those pieces of information, I deduced that you are Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.”

“This is truly amazing!” the writer exclaimed. “You are a real-life counter-part to my fictional creation, Sherlock Holmes!”

“There is one other thing,” the driver said.

“What is that?”

“Your name is on the front of your suitcase.”